Gym Observations

After taking a week off from the gym, I needed to occupy my mind today while I churned away at the elliptical and bike, so it was time for some good ole people watching!  I do 30 minutes on each machine and that hour brought some observations today that I share because they are most likely far more interesting than what I did this weekend.

• An over sized tunic off-shoulder style top may look cute, but if you're constantly pulling it up your shoulder, only to have it fall back down (as it should since it's an OFF THE SHOULDER top), maybe you shouldn't wear it to the gym.
• To the old man wearing bright banana yellow sneakers.  You rock!  Great style.
• Cement colored work out pants are unflattering and look dingy.  Be safe, wear black.
• The juice bar girl walking around the floor of the weight area with a tray and samples, is *sigh* probably handing out energy bar samples and not cookies or cupcakes (as I found myself hoping she was while I was pedaling away).
• My black and purple accented gym shoes seemed boring in comparison to a funky and fun pair I saw jogging away on a treadmill.  Think watermelon: fun bright green with hot pink laces.  Super cute!
• What's a bigger offense?  Gym clothes that smell moldy, or being stuck on an elliptical next to a chick who has on so much perfume you can barely breathe?  Thankfully this did not happen today, but has in the past, and as perfume girl walked by today I was silently praying she'd keep right on walking and find a machine far, far away so I'd be out of her over-perfumed zone.
• If you're going to hold up your towel to cover your nakedness, but only in the front, and leave your butt hanging out, I'm going to be glad you're headed down the hallway to the showers and there aren't any mirrors so you can see me smirking at you behind your back.  It just looks funny!
• An older woman approached two of the OCFA guys as they biked and spoke with them for a few minutes.  Flirting with the firemen ;)
• Are you addicted to daytime TV if you program not only the TV on your bike, but the one on the empty bike next to you so you've got your talk shows covered?  Do you hate the gym so much you need the extra distraction?
• If your gym towel, when draped around your neck, has me wondering if you're wearing a cute polka dotted scarf - is it stylish or extreme?  Or do you just have such fancy towels that your gym towel puts my version of a gym towel, an 8-to-a-pack washcloth from Target, to shame?

I've had other gym observations in the past, believe it or not, the above list is just from today!  One member appreciation day saw the gym handing out Monster energy drinks.  Pretty sure they intended for you to take one on your way out, but one guy took one heading in and proceeded to drink it while doing a cardio workout.  But the worst offense had to be grandpa walking around with his venti Frap, complete with a large fluffy dollop of whip cream.  Not only did he make me want to stop at Starbucks, but what the heck was the point of going to the gym if you're just going to consume a beverage like that?

Then there's 'bat man.'  An older guy, who wears short booty compression type shorts and a large do-rag getup with the long tails trailing down the back of his too tight tank top.  He's in shape, but when most of the women in the gym are wearing more clothes than you, maybe you should invest in a shirt with sleeves, or maybe shorts that hit mid thigh.  I call him bat man because he always catches my attention because he uses the machines for very unique exercises, most recently, hanging upside down to stretch? or something, not sure, I had to look away at that point.

There was also the grandma who initially had me applauding her fitness level as she used various machines on the weight room floor - but when she came up and hopped onto the bike next to me, had me wondering if she was a germaphobe.  She wore a large, long sleeve peach button down shirt.  She wiped down the bike with paper towel and Purell, then put a large towel down, completely covering the seat.  Then more Purell for her hands. THEN she dug around in her gym bag and pulled out a pair of brown mittens so large they looked like they belonged to her husband, and proceeded to put on the mittens before she could touch the bike to program her workout.

But hey, maybe I shouldn't judge.  I show up in my boring black gym pants and a solid colored tee, my gym towel, as mentioned above, is a washcloth, and since I've most likely just dropped my son off at day care, if he happens to have a runny nose, I could be walking around with snot on the shoulders of my shirt and end up being the target of someones gym observation list.  :)